Review: Christmas breakfast, lunch & dinner for 10 for £70

Our writer reviews a Christmas hamper that supplies breakfast, turkey and trimmings for 10 people.

Anyone who’s hosted Christmas before knows that it’s not so much dashing through the snow as dashing through the shops.

There’s a lot to cook, a lot to think of… and a lot to buy.

So I agreed to review a luxury Christmas turkey hamper from the company MuscleFood.

The rest of the year it supplies meat and protein-rich snacks to bodybuilders (hence the name), but in December it offers massive festive meat hampers for relatively low costs.

I cooked up the turkey hamper, designed to feed 8-10 ‘hungry’ people, at a cost of £61 (we needed to buy a couple of extras as I'll explain later, hence the £70 figure in the headline).

We fed 10, but 6 of those were children ranging in age from 2-12.

But we fed them three meals using this hamper and still had enormous amounts of leftovers. I am very confident we could have easily fed 10 adults with normal appetites the same number of meals.

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What did it cost?

All in all, I got 30 meals out of it – a large cooked breakfast (I added eggs), a Christmas lunch with all the trimmings (I added vegetables) and a large evening meal of leftover turkey, sausages, stuffing and a bacon-wrapped brie ‘bomb’ (I added bread rolls and crisps).

So £61 for the hamper, plus about £8 on rolls, eggs, veg and crisps. Call it around £70 in total.

That means we got 30 filling festive meals for £70, with leftovers for packed lunches the next day – and a pretty massive pile of scraps for two dogs (we regretted that, though, the dogs’ turkey farts were terrible to experience).

So £2.33 per meal, without factoring in the leftovers still in my fridge.

But Christmas isn’t just about the cost, it’s also about the quality and having all the essentials. Here’s how the food went down:

What’s included?

Pictured above: one of the guests carves the turkey

In the standard luxury turkey hamper, costing £60, you get a 3-3.4kg whole British turkey hen, four 170g rump steaks, 10 pigs in blankets, 12 sage and onion pork stuffing balls, 350g streaky bacon rashers and a bag of ready-made turkey gravy.

Spend an extra £1 and you get an additional 53 items, including a bacon-wrapped brie bomb, 10 more pigs in blankets, ready-made bubble and squeak with bacon, 16 chipolata sausages, 454g sausage meat, 12 more stuffing balls, an extra 350g of streaky bacon rashers, three disposable foul roasting trays and a tea-towel.

That’s really not bad compared to even the discounter supermarkets.

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How did it taste?

I was worried that the quantity of food included might mean the quality suffered but actually, this was a great lunch.

My food tasters reported that the turkey, bacon, sausages, pigs in blankets and more were all very, very good: juicy, filling and full of flavour.

The bubble and squeak was a nice addition; not Christmas tradition but something that went very well with the other food on the plate.

Feeding the children was easier too, there were enough different bits that every child was able to eat a good lunch, even if they didn’t really like turkey.

Not every single element was a hit. The foodies around the table weren’t huge fans of the bacon-wrapped brie, saying that the bacon didn’t add much to it.

And not everyone liked the pork stuffing balls.

But the empty plates and second helpings showed that this was a good quality, good tasting lunch.

One thing to mention: when I was first asked to review this hamper I was promised a ‘glitterbomb turkey’, where edible glitter is painted onto the bird before you bring it to the table.

That glitter is for sale on the site now for £2 a packet.

Clearly, that’s something designed to appeal to the Instagram generation, where food needs an extra wow factor. Simply looking appetising isn’t enough, it needs some bling.

Genuinely hard to say if I was disappointed or delighted that they did not send us the edible glitter.

What about animal welfare?

Full transparency: I actually don’t eat meat. Yes, the vegetarian writer reviewed the meat hamper.

But my family and friends all do, and they gathered to eat the meal and report back to me on the flavour and quality of the food.

What I cared about was animal welfare. Was this meat so well-priced because it’s all low-welfare, from intensively farmed pigs, turkeys and cows?

Here’s what they told me: “MuscleFood.com works with some of the world’s best and most trusted farmers, where welfare and provenance is key.

They’ve known their farmers for years and know that by working with them closely every day, everybody wins.

“They will send you the best meats you will ever taste, and the farmers can rely on a fair price, and trust their support for traditional husbandry. That means no rushing, no artificial rubbish, and top quality, great tasting meats.

“MuscleFood.com keeps the cost down by cutting out the middleman and working directly with farmers. Savings are then passed on to customers who are enjoying everyday wholesale pricing.

“We ensure all our farmers have a responsible approach to the use of antibiotics and our animals are all reared to EU welfare guidelines and produced in a BRC accredited facility.”

That might not be quite as reassuring as sourcing locally produced, free-range Christmas meat but at least you know where the meat has come from and that the company is taking an interest in welfare and provenance.

And the website lets you know exactly where the meat has come from, with British and Irish farms providing much of it. I found that reassuring.

If you want to cook up this hamper this Christmas, you need to order by December 21st.

How much do you spend on Christmas lunch with all the trimmings? Have your say using the comments below.