We admit yesterday's joke, but you really must read all the entertaining comments we've received from Fools who were fools and those who were not!
I'm sorry everyone, but the article Who You Vote For Affects Your Credit Rating was an April Fools' joke. You don't need to worry about your application to Northern Rock if you support the Tories!
I really do feel bad to have tricked you all though. When I read your hundreds of emails, article comments and discussion-board messages, I reflexively covered my eyes with my hands at times. (When someone writes 'Sir' in an email, then proceeds to be brilliantly indignant, you know that that person is not going to be happy when they realise they've been fooled.)
But you all do outraged so very well, so I hope that you take the joke in the spirit it was meant. Your comments and emails have been very entertaining, and I've included a select number of them below.
What have we learned?
If it makes you feel better, I don't think that falling for this one is so bad. I think it shows a healthy cynicism for banks' practices, because, and I don't want to sound too doomful, we really cannot trust them. (Read New Banking Code Fails Consumers, for example. And no, that one wasn't an April Fools.)
But, if we stay vigilant and take an interest in money, we have nothing to fear! Despite any dodgy practices that are going on, we can use banks to get out of debt, save money and make money, which is what The Motley Fool is all about, as much as to educate and amuse.
The banks might have profits foremost on their minds, but they do still produce a lot of great products that can help us to achieve our financial goals. You just have to know where to find them. (You could start with The Ten Best Financial Products.)
When we at The Fool aren't donning our jester's hats, we'll continue to give you the best possible guidance to ensure that you use your bank and it doesn't use you. And we will keep on using the best sources and statistics, and the most robust analysis, unlike the 'analysis' in my April Fools' article!
You're a funny lot!
So now on to the fun bit, which is the messages you sent us! Let's start with a message from former managing director and Fool co-founder Bruce Jackson, who posted from his home in Australia. An old hand like him wasn't falling for it, hence his tongue-in-cheek reply:
"Bring back Tony Blair. Such scandals would never have happened under his watch. For that matter, bring back Thatcher, Major and Gazza too."
Now the award for best message of the day was certainly won by Fool user farcicle:
This has made me very very angry indeed. How DARE these banks presume to discriminate according to political preferences? It's a breach of our human rights! This has completely put me off my breakfast and I don't think I will recover, till at least mid-day.
Without further ado, here is the rest of the cream of the responses we've received (including some messages that were deleted before 12pm, because, amusing as they were, we didn't want to spoil the joke):
Comments by email
According to a new article on the Motley Fool UK, UK banks are using details of a persons' political affilations as a criterion for approving credit applications.
Do you know if this assertion is accurate please?
Thank you very much.
To: The Motley Fool
Very good. You are too young to have seen the Richard Dimbleby "spaghetti spoof" but this is approaching it.
To: Richard.xxxx
Cc: The Motley Fool
Hey Rich
Please look at the motley fool website......so much for privacy hey! Big Brother is definately watching us in more ways than ever before. We must stand up for our rights...
To: (20 friends!)
Cc: The Motley Fool
I read this article this morning and thought it was disgusting that your political views are not only used but used against you, plus it is information that is not relevant! Send it to as many people as you can
To: The Motley Fool
Nice one. Up there with the BBC's flying penguins and BMWs that can now scare cats away with regenerative electric shocks.
To: Undisclosed recipients
Cc: The Motley Fool
Can you believe it?? The banks can actually tell who we are voting for, and then use it against us to determine our credit rating! Not only does it beg the question "How on earth do they get our supposedly confidential voting information?" but it also means that we are potentially being unfairly penalised simply for our political views.
To: The Motley Fool
By the way - just been turned down for a loan with the Co-op Bank. Do they support Labour???
Comments beneath the article and by discussion boards
doloskea: I demand to know how The Fool found out whom I vote for in order to do the quoted "analysis"!
nihonfool: My first reaction is to question the validity of the statistical analysis. Correlations mean nothing unless you can produce a theory that provides an explanation. Otherwise you are probably following a variable that itself is linked to something more fundamental. e.g. Post Code and voting intentions. Does your data include Banks that support the Labour Party and discriminate against Conservatives? Does it include Labour Party members who live in a 'rich' Postal Code Area who are discriminated against by Conservative supporting Banks? There is so much 'correlational rubbish' served up by the medical profession, that it will be a shame if the columns of Financial Reporters become similarly infected!
davidatccc: Havign spent more than 20 years in the credit industry in charge of lending processes, I was extremely annoyed to see this piece of utter nonsense - until I remembered the date. What worries me is the number of people taken in by this. This is a dangerous April Fool.
stinga: Very good, very good indeed...
cyprusal: I'm thinking, 'give your bank a call and ask them if they know who you support', what planet is this guy on.
Then I got the joke...so well done.
two2sheds: My first reaction was that election exit polls are answered by a surprisingly large number of people, and this could be a source.
But then I noticed that the tea-leaves in my mug had formed into a 1 and a 4, what could this mean? I have just now heard that the Poisson Davril Bank are giving euro loans at 5%, so I have to go.
sandraroff: Who you vote for has been open for anyone to see (who are to do with the election process) for years. Take a close look when you next go to vote: your voting slip has a number printed on it. when they cross your name off the list as having been in and voted, the number off the slip is written next to your name and address. Hey presto, they all know who you voted for. Secret???? my ar*****.
alanw107: My money is on Northern Rock backing labour. If so, it will open up many questions as to how the FSA failed so badly in its monitoring of NR.
tilburyre: Banks may be able to find out what party we support if we are an official member or if we make substantial donations. There is no way they can find out who we voted for and this article is just scaremongering in implying that they can. They might just be able to find out who we said we voted for by getting access to poll data or by commissioning a poll with that question in it. But most polls 'guarantee' anonymity of the answers.
This Sun type journalism is unworthy of The Fool.
why500: It's the first of April and the Fool has pulled a brilliant stroke!
tickerhacker: Nice one. I'll vote for anyone who gives me a loan. Just show me the MONEY!!
rosie46: I took note after being warned by a political friend not to vote unless I was sure I knew what I was doing because how you vote affects everything from things like planning permission (on a local level) to bank loans (on a national level). After being thanked personally by the candidate for voting in a local election for him I decided to look into how he knew.
As Sandraroff has pointed out, it's really quite simple. Your polling card has a number. Your details are crossed off at the station & your voting slip number is cross-matched with your polling card number. There is no such thing as a secret so be aware that if you vote, it can have consequences.
slickfingers: One way they may obtain info, (if like mine) your union membership entitles you to access to loans at special rates etc. However i assume if you take up a loan or finance of some kind, your details are instantly on a list that all sorts of companies can access. Your union usually asks if you will make a donation to the labour party by subscription. Hey presto!
paulwalling: I can't believe how many serious comments you got on this - but the article is quite convincing - tho' not quite as clever as the 'Martian invasion' news report of many years ago! Are we all so angry with our stoopid lying self-serving government that we've forgotten what day it is ?
ruisliprabbitt: Nihonfool has it right I think. As a former banker I give no credence whatsoever to this link that Neil Faulkner has made. Banks try to lend only to those who can afford to repay them (don't bother going off on one when I say that), so it doesn't matter which party it is.
This just seems to be a foolish journalist trying to find an angle for a story that is not there.
How long before this message is edited off the site?
[Author's note: I assure you, I will never be 'trying to find an angle' in my articles. I'm chock full of original ideas, as followers of my articles (Hello? Are you there? Anyone?) will know. Except on rare occasions, I do all my own analysis, rather than relying on other sources to do it for me. Also, we don't delete comments expressing negative opinion of any of our articles, only libellous or defamatory comments, or similar (or when people try to spoil April Fools jokes before 12pm!). So please continue to post when you like our articles, not just when you disagree with us!]
dom14: Will all you righteous indignants please take a look at the date on all these posts!! :)
juustme: Eagerly awaiting which party is supported by which bank. Donation in one hand and loan application in the other :-)
ElectricMonk: OMG! Has no one realised what day it is? Neil is pulling our pudendums.
tobstv: As I don't support any party, does this explain why all I ever get is junk mail from ALL high street banks? And which parties are mostly sponsored by loan sharks ?
mrTcrazyfool: Of course this is a perfectly reasonable marketing tool, surely people realise that their likely voting preferences are available through public websites such as upmystreet. and you have to provide your address to the Bank when you apply for a loan. Just like putting two and two together and making ... er a spaggetti tree. ;-)
Lysandros: That goes realy down as one of the best articles of April Fools' day. If I got this correct with my first posting I must be a big FOOL!!!!!!!!! Best regards to all Fool members and staff.
hannafp: Ahh, almost caught me - was think its all bit naughty, and then remembered the date. Best one I've heard/seen today.
These messages have been lightly edited to correct the more obvious English mistakes, but without changing the meaning.