I fell in love with a scammer!

Robert Powell takes a look at how an internet romance can quickly turn into costly scam...

When John Paul Young sang ‘Love Is in the Air’ back in 1977, he probably didn’t mean that it was in our wireless internet connections and iPhone signals. Yet in the modern world, it is indeed the internet that is providing a romantic spark for many singles looking for love.

Experian Hitwise research shows that visits to online dating sites rose by 22% between February 2010 and 2011. Over-50s are especially keen to find love online with visits to mature dating sites rising by a whopping 460% in the same period.

But it’s not all chocolates and roses, as online dating sites also give scammers the perfect opportunity to con you out of your hard-earned cash...

Cupid cons!

Scammers will often exploit users of dating sites by fooling them into thinking they have met their perfect partner. This allows them to worm their way into your affections and get hold of your personal details in an attempt to gain access to your cards and bank accounts and steal your identity.

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Dating site scammers may also use your new found affection and ask to borrow money – often making up a tragic story to justify their request.

According to the Serious Organised Crime Agency, one romance-scammer bagged £700,000 from just five women, while a male victim committed suicide after being robbed of £80,000.

But there are a few simple things you can do to stay safe when looking for love online.*

Stay safe

Check out the dating site: Read some reviews and user feedback before handing over any money to a dating site. If you come across a free site offering a full service then be very wary as it could be a front for a fraudster site designed to steal your information. If it looks too good to be true, then it probably is!

Watch out for phishing e-mails: We’ve reported extensively on sneaky phishing scams, and online dating is another front that phishing fraudsters will use to get their hands on your personal details. So if you do receive an e-mail out of the blue offering you membership to a dating site – just delete it!

Be suspicious: Even if you’re positive that you’ve been struck by Cupid’s digital arrow, you should still be suspicious when getting to know anyone on a dating site. You should be especially wary of people who are keen to know all about you but don’t give much away about themselves.

Keeping an eye on the text and pictures of users is also a good idea as fraudsters will use standard photos and scripted profiles and correspondence to target several people at once. They may also claim to be in the military or have a job that involves frequent travel in order to justify secretive and dodgy behaviour.

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Guard your details: Be very careful what information you send to other people on dating sites. Giving away details like you full address, date of birth, nicknames and names of relatives can easily be used by ID thieves and fraudsters attempting to access your bank accounts and cards.

Check your credit report and bank accounts: Keep tabs on your bank accounts and credit record and report any suspicious activity to your bank immediately. You can check your credit record for free by signing up for a 30-day trial of Experian’s Credit Expert – just remember to cancel the subscription before you have to make any payments!

Staying safe when using dating sites is obviously essential but not being ripped off when using them is also important. So here are some cheap ways to meet potential partners online:

The cheapest dating sites

We reviewed a whole range of free and paid-for dating sites in The cheapest online dating websites, and you had quite a few of your own suggestions. lovemoney.com user, gola mentioned plentyoffish.com, smooch.com, lookitsme.co.uk and completelyfreedating.co.uk. But as I mentioned earlier, you should be very careful if you choose to use one of these free websites and stay suspicious of every user you speak to on there as they can be rife with scammers.

There’s also a few other cheap dating sites that Emma didn’t mention in her article. Friends United Dating, an offshoot to the main Friends United site, was rated as the third best dating site by Hitwise last year. It’s free to join, search and view profiles but you’ll need a subscription to contact other users.

Be2.co.uk is similar to parship.co.uk in that it uses psychometric and personality-led tests to match you with a suitable partner, while eHarmony allows you to join and review your matches for free and only start paying when you’re ready to start talking.

Frugal first dates

So if you do manage to find a date online – where do you go? Check out our article from last year 24 cheap first dates for some frugal options!

This article also attracted a few comments, some of which you might find useful. Ladydriver had some great advice for anyone who lives in a university town – keep an eye on the university theatre groups and music groups for cheap performances.

It’s also a good idea to keep checking our Frugal Food blog which is updated every Friday with the best restaurant and supermarket bargains for the week ahead.

Your tips!

Have you ever had a bad experience using dating sites? Is it best to steer clear of online romances all together and just head down to the nearest bar and do it the old fashioned way!?

Let us know your thoughts in the comment box below.

*Tips provided by Experian Hitwise.

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